Saturday 23 February 2013

Funny Christmas Statuses

Source (google.com.pk)
Funny Christmas Statuses Biogtaphy
 Dear Santa, I was framed...

is excited for Christmas. What other time of the year can you sit around a dead tree and eat candy out of socks? >^_^<

Dear Santa, you are a perv. How do you know I've been naughty?!

is reminding everyone not to eat yellow snow.

is in Santa's workshop chasing elves!

Dear Santa, I can explain...

wonders why the big guy in the funny red suit gets all the credit, when I do all the shopping, all the wrapping and pay for everything!!!

wants a money tree for Christmas!!

thinks that if you believe men and women are equal, then you clearly have not watched a man try and wrap a Christmas present

A boy writes to Santa asking for a brother and receives a reply back from Santa: send me your mother!

Christmas.. The wonderful time of year when you get your dysfunctional families all under one roof. Merry Christmas

Sent Santa a letter saying I wanted a nice, caring, intelligent, loving man for Christmas, just got a letter back saying "I'm Santa not a bloody miracle worker"

Dear Santa. Lets just say mistakes were made...

The 3 stages of life:  1) You believe in Santa Claus!  2) You don't believe in Santa Claus!  3) You are Santa Claus!

.......why is a christmas tree better than a man???  It stays up for 12 days & nights, has cute balls and looks good with the lights on!!!!!

shares some useless Trivia with you..How many feet does the average wrapping paper roll have? 4 inches less than what you need. Happy Holidays!

Name your top 5 all time favorite Christmas movies...

Dear Santa, can you please email me a copy of your naughty list please? I wanna know where all the 'naughty boys' live. Thanks.

is ready for snow, fires, Hot cocoa, presents, and time with the family. BRING ON CHRISTMAS!

Tis the season to be sneezing, fa la la la la, la la la la, blow ur nose because its freezing, fa la la la la, la la la la

Dear Santa, I didn't want to make it too hard for you this year, so, the only thing on my list this year is...1 year paid leave from work...with bonus...

Dear Santa, Define naughty..

I'm going to wrap batteries for Christmas and put a note saying "TOY NOT INCLUDED"

some weird fat man just shoved me into a big red sock... OK people, who asked for me this Christmas... xxx

We tell kids not to talk to strangers. Then we bring them to the mall, plop them on the lap of a big, fat, creepy guy and wonder why they scream bloody murder!

i took down my Xmas lights cuz they remind me of my friends. they all hang together, half of 'em don't work, and the ones that do, ain't that bright.

Here's your chance to play Santa. I want you to comment if I've been NAUGHTY or NICE and what I would deserve as a present. Anything goes ;D

Dear Santa, All I want is a little help with cleaning and decorating the house..can't you spare a couple of elves?

Tis the season to spend money fa la la la la la la la la, I'm really broke and it's not funny fa la la la la la la la la.

A secret I am going to share w/ my friends... During the Holiday season- if no one else witnesses you eat something yummy- the calories DO NOT COUNT!

would like like to extend her heartfelt thanks to both the turkey and the ham that participated in this year's festivities.  (and R.I.P)

Christmas is coming, Christmas is coming, Christmas is coming, Christmas is coming, Christmas is coming, Christmas is coming - did you get the message yet?

is sooo sick of everyone saying 'Happy Holidays', for fear they might offend someone.  So, I'll say it straight up - MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Dear Santa, I have given my wish-list a lot of thought this year. I decided I want a tazer gun for Christmas. It seems like it would be really fun to play with!

If u wake up on Christmas day and taste anything weird in ur mouth, then rememba that Santa only cums once a year :p

Lets see how big this Christmas list will get? Everyone add one gift they would want for Christmas 2010.

If someone really annoys me, I'm gonna give their number to a bunch of over hyper kids and tell them that it's Santa clauses hot-line.

Its beginning to look a lot like Christmas! People are definitely getting in the holiday spirit, CRABBY, GRABBY and RUDE!

Dear Santa, Let's cut the crap this year, shall we? You know what I want. I know I'm not getting it. Here's your burnt cookies and warm, curdled milk.

How is it we cant say Christmas in fear of "offending someone" but we have to push 1 to hear English?

Dear Santa, I have been very naughty this year but I PROMISE..I will be good for the rest of the year, please put under my tree,some CASH and a NICE LOOKING MAN

is going to triple dog dare someone to lick a flagpole this winter :)

You know it's bad when you spend more time decorating your Facebook games for the holidays than you do your own home!

oh look its 1 minute nearer to Christmas

From now onwards dun put "Ha ha ha" but you must put "Ho ho ho".

... four stages of life - You believe in Santa Claus. You don't believe in Santa Claus. You are Santa Claus. You look like Santa Claus.

Here's my Christmas wish list..Tall, strong, loyal, passionate, sincere, funny, handsome to my eyes, lovable guy. Santa, I've been REALLY REALLY good this year!

May your turkey be plump, May your potatoes & gravy have nary a lump. May your pies take the prize and Christmas dinner stays off your thighs

Dear Santa, please send some of your elves to tidy my house and make my cookies.  i did your job and got the presents i think you owe me

is like a Candy Cane - sweet but very twisted

has finally figured out the colors of Xmas! Red for the blood sweat and tears we shed, green for the money we spend, and white for the padded room we need.

To All My Friends: We may be on Santa's naughty list but think of the fun we had getting there!!

...Bad traffic, crowded shops and rude people - It's beginning to look a lot like christmas!

tis the season to b naughty falalalala deck the halls wit poison ivy falalalala smash a window, pop a tire falalalala set ur sisters hair on fire falalalala HA

*<[:{)  Santa!

is on the island of misfit toys and kinda feels at home here.

Says All I Want For Christmas is something tall, cuddly and handsome with a sprinkling of tattoos and a temptingly sweet center!

Remember what Christmas was like when we were kids?? Post your favorite childhood Christmas memory below...GO =)

is writing a Christmas Story.  Please help by adding a sentence.  Ready?  Go: Twas' the night before Christmas...

Don't expect much for Christmas... Santa's sleigh was repossessed, the North Pole is in foreclosure, and the elves have been laid off.

Ah Christmas, a time for fighting, arguing, getting drunk and eating too much.Whose house we at this year?

- Dear Santa; Is it too late to start being good?

Jingle bells Jingle bells, Santa's smokin weed, Mrs clause is on the floor , she's overdosed on speed

I can't tell you what I want for xmas. I'd end up on the naughty list for sure ;)

is starting to think that Santa just isn't that into me.

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year.

thinks it was a bad idea trying to be the angel on the top of the xmas tree. Now its flat and I have needles in my bum. 

Funny Christmas Statuses
Funny Christmas Statuses
Funny Christmas Statuses
Funny Christmas Statuses
Funny Christmas Statuses
Funny Christmas Statuses
Funny Christmas Statuses
Funny Christmas Statuses
Funny Christmas Statuses
Funny Christmas Statuses
Funny Christmas Statuses

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